For a long time after treatment I believed the best of me was gone.
That she disappeared sometime during the chemo and radiation.
One minute she was there, the next minute she vanished along with my hair.
Who was I now?
Who was I now my femininity and identity had left the building?
I felt like an empty vessel.
It looked like me from the outside.
But on the inside I was completely different.
I was empty, confused and lost.
Like I had become a shadow of my former self.
Was I now expected to make do with living in the shadow of who I was before I got cancer?
What kind of bullshit life would that be?
After going through cancer I’m not willing to walk in anyone’s shadow.
Least of all my former self.
I want to be bigger, bolder and brighter than I’ve ever been.
Because, quite frankly, I deserve it.
I may be a little bit broken and battered after treatment.
But I’m still here.
And the best of me is still here too.
What about you?
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